Thursday, November 10, 2005

You Know You Live In Florida when...

1. You have FEMA's number on your speed dial.

2. You have more than 300 C and D batteries in your kitchen drawer.

3. Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti O's.

4. You're thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood covering your windows.

5. Your Social Security Number is not a secret, it's written in sharpie on your arms.

6. The road leading to your house has been declared a No-Wake Zone. (as in the wake left by a motor boat for you land lubers).

7. You can wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and not feel the least bit guilty about it.

8. Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain, today you can assemble a portable generator by candlelight.

9. You catch a 13-pound redfish. In your driveway.

10. You can recite from memory whole portions of your homeowner's insurance policy.

11. You can rattle off the names of all the meteorologist who work at your local stations and at least 3 of the ones on the Weather Channel.

12. Someone comes to your door to inform you that they found your roof.

13. A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center.

14. Your child's first words are "hunker down"

15. Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's Christmas.

16. Toilet paper is worth more than gold coins.

17. You know the difference between the "good side" of a storm and the "bad side."

18. Your kids start school in August and finish in July.

19. You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air conditioning.

3 Comments:

Blogger HeyJules said...

Not to minimize the pain of all that...but that was ONE funny list!

12:32 AM  
Blogger Marguerite Jasmin said...

hmm so Florida is not only about sunshine. Many Haitians living in Florida were really badly affected by that last hurricane, many people say that for many days they had to live in conditions similar (worse) to those in Haiti, no water, no electricity, unable to cook anything... it seems the hurricane caught them by surprise...Your blog has changed a bit.

9:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Here are few more to add to your list...

1. You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air conditioning.

2. You now know how to comb your hair while holding a flashlight over your head.

3. With no electricity you can now show your kids that there really are stars!

4. Your new skylight in the bedroom is where the roof WAS.

1:47 PM  

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